Step right up
Step right up
Everyone's a winner, bargains galore
That's right, you too can be the proud owner
Of the quality goes in before the name goes on
One-tenth of a dollar
One-tenth of a dollar
We got service after sales
You need perfume? we got perfume
How 'bout an engagement ring?
Something for the little lady
Something for the little lady
Something for the little lady, hmm
Three for a dollar
We got a year-end clearance, we got a white sale
And a smoke-damaged furniture
You can drive it away today
Act now, act now
And receive as our gift, our gift to you
They come in all colors, one size fits all
No muss, no fuss, no spills
You're tired of kitchen drudgery
Everything must go
Going out of business
Going out of business
Going out of business sale
Fifty percent off original retail price
Skip the middle man
Don't settle for less
How do we do it?
How do we do it?
Volume, volume, turn up the volume
Now you've heard it advertised, don't hesitate
Don't be caught with your drawers down
Don't be caught with your drawers down
You can step right up, step right up
That's right, it filets, it chops
It dices, slices, never stops
Lasts a lifetime, mows your lawn
And it mows your lawn
And it picks up the kids from school
It gets rid of unwanted facial hair
It gets rid of embarrassing age spots
It delivers a pizza
And it lengthens, and it strengthens
And it finds that slipper that's been at large
Under the chaise longe for several weeks
And it plays a mean Rhythm Master
It makes excuses for unwanted lipstick on your collar
And it's only a dollar, step right up
It's only a dollar, step right up
'Cause it forges your signature.
If not completely satisfied
Mail back unused portion of product
For complete refund of price of purchase
Step right up
Please allow thirty days for delivery
Don't be fooled by cheap imitations
You can live in it, live in it
Laugh in it, love in it
Swim in it, sleep in it
Live in it, swim in it
Laugh in it, love in it
Removes embarrassing stains from contour sheets
That's right
And it entertains visiting relatives
It turns a sandwich into a banquet
Tired of being the life of the party?
Change your shorts
Change your life
Change your life
Change into a nine-year-old Hindu boy
Get rid of your wife
And it walks your dog, and it doubles on sax
Doubles on sax, you can jump back Jack
See you later alligator
See you later alligator
And it steals your car
It gets rid of your gambling debts, it quits smoking
It's a friend, and it's a companion
And it's the only product you will ever need
Follow these easy assembly instructions
It never needs ironing
Well it takes weights off hips, bust
Thighs, chin, midriff
Gives you dandruff, and it finds you a job
It is a job
And it strips the phone company free
Take ten for five exchange
And it gives you denture breath
And you know it's a friend, and it's a companion
And it gets rid of your traveler's checks
It's new, it's improved, it's old-fashioned
Well it takes care of business
Never needs winding
Never needs winding
Never needs winding
Gets rid of blackheads, the heartbreak of psoriasis
Christ, you don't know the meaning of heartbreak, buddy
C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon
'Cause it's effective, it's defective
It creates household odors
It disinfects, it sanitizes for your protection
It gives you an erection
It wins the election
Why put up with painful corns any longer?
It's a redeemable coupon, no obligation
No salesman will visit your home
We got a jackpot, jackpot, jackpot
Prizes, prizes, prizes, all work guaranteed
How do we do it
How do we do it
How do we do it
How do we do it
We need your business
We're going out of business
We'll give you the business
Get on the business
End of our going-out-of-business sale
Receive our free brochure, free brochure
Read the easy-to-follow assembly instructions
Batteries not included
Send before midnight tomorrow, terms available
Step right up
Step right up
Step right up
You got it buddy: the large print giveth
And the small print taketh away
Step right up
You can step right up
You can step right up
C'mon step right up
(Get away from me kid, you bother me...)
Step right up, step right up, step right up
C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon
Step right up
You can step right up
C'mon and step right up
C'mon and step right up
Step right up Step right up Step right up Everyone's a winner, bargains galore That's right, you too can be the proud owner Of the quality goes in before the name goes on One-tenth of a dollar One-tenth of a dollar We got service after sales You need perfume? we got perfume How 'bout an engagement ring? Something for the little lady Something for the little lady Something for the little lady, hmm Three for a dollar We got a year-end clearance, we got a white sale And a smoke-damaged furniture You can drive it away today Act now, act now And receive as our gift, our gift to you They come in all colors, one size fits all No muss, no fuss, no spills You're tired of kitchen drudgery Everything must go Going out of business Going out of business Going out of business sale Fifty percent off original retail price Skip the middle man Don't settle for less How do we do it? How do we do it? Volume, volume, turn up the volume Now you've heard it advertised, don't hesitate Don't be caught with your drawers down Don't be caught with your drawers down You can step right up, step right up That's right, it filets, it chops It dices, slices, never stops Lasts a lifetime, mows your lawn And it mows your lawn And it picks up the kids from school It gets rid of unwanted facial hair It gets rid of embarrassing age spots It delivers a pizza And it lengthens, and it strengthens And it finds that slipper that's been at large Under the chaise longe for several weeks And it plays a mean Rhythm Master It makes excuses for unwanted lipstick on your collar And it's only a dollar, step right up It's only a dollar, step right up 'Cause it forges your signature. If not completely satisfied Mail back unused portion of product For complete refund of price of purchase Step right up Please allow thirty days for delivery Don't be fooled by cheap imitations You can live in it, live in it Laugh in it, love in it Swim in it, sleep in it Live in it, swim in it Laugh in it, love in it Removes embarrassing stains from contour sheets That's right And it entertains visiting relatives It turns a sandwich into a banquet Tired of being the life of the party? Change your shorts Change your life Change your life Change into a nine-year-old Hindu boy Get rid of your wife And it walks your dog, and it doubles on sax Doubles on sax, you can jump back Jack See you later alligator See you later alligator And it steals your car It gets rid of your gambling debts, it quits smoking It's a friend, and it's a companion And it's the only product you will ever need Follow these easy assembly instructions It never needs ironing Well it takes weights off hips, bust Thighs, chin, midriff Gives you dandruff, and it finds you a job It is a job And it strips the phone company free Take ten for five exchange And it gives you denture breath And you know it's a friend, and it's a companion And it gets rid of your traveler's checks It's new, it's improved, it's old-fashioned Well it takes care of business Never needs winding Never needs winding Never needs winding Gets rid of blackheads, the heartbreak of psoriasis Christ, you don't know the meaning of heartbreak, buddy C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon 'Cause it's effective, it's defective It creates household odors It disinfects, it sanitizes for your protection It gives you an erection It wins the election Why put up with painful corns any longer? It's a redeemable coupon, no obligation No salesman will visit your home We got a jackpot, jackpot, jackpot Prizes, prizes, prizes, all work guaranteed How do we do it How do we do it How do we do it How do we do it We need your business We're going out of business We'll give you the business Get on the business End of our going-out-of-business sale Receive our free brochure, free brochure Read the easy-to-follow assembly instructions Batteries not included Send before midnight tomorrow, terms available Step right up Step right up Step right up You got it buddy: the large print giveth And the small print taketh away Step right up You can step right up You can step right up C'mon step right up (Get away from me kid, you bother me...) Step right up, step right up, step right up C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon Step right up You can step right up C'mon and step right up C'mon and step right up Explain Request ×
Lyrics taken from
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