Dayglo Abortions – When The Big Hand Meets The Little Hand lyrics

Gather round and listen up my children
This is a story that'll scare the turds right out of your underwear
It's about a place called Neverland
Where all the naughty boys have to go for a sleep over

The man who lives there is creepy and weird
He looks like the bearded lady but without the beard
By the day he's full of fun and games
But as soon as you go to sleep he tries to slither under your sheets

All you naughty boys are gonna be sorry
When the big hand meets the little hand
I know you're bad but this guys worse
When the big hand meets the little hand

Now you might think that your parents are cruel
Sending you off to get molested is not very cool
But you should have thought about that when you were being bad
Now it's off to Michael Jackson's you should have listened to your dad

But if you're lucky and quick to act
You just might escape with your virginity intact
Right before bed you've gotta ask to you the phone
Tell him you miss your parents and you have to call home

But instead of your parents dial 9111
And when the operator answers, this is what you tell them
"Help me I'm at Michael Jackson's house and he's
Stuck his glove up my shorts"

All you naughty boys are gonna get a fright
When the big hand meets the little hand
Cause Michael Jackson's gonna get you tonight
When the big hand meets the little hand