Gerard Way – Pogi's Cavern lyrics

[Spoken]

Located just twelve miles from Pine Swallow, South Dakota, Pogi's Cavern boasts one of the most interesting array of rust formations, stalactites. This follows a small assortment of crystal formations and creatures unique to its series of caves. Reaching depths of 1,996 miles, only 173 of them have been mapped out by researchers, spelunkers, and geologists, like the Carson family. This is due to its treacherous and unpredictable drop-offs, razor-sharp stalagmites, and semi-gelatinous poison lakes, which produce gas that can cause disorientation, leaving many explorers lost, succumbing to starvation, and eventually, madness. First thing you'll notice upon entering Pogi's Cavern is a faint hum, at a low frequency, emitting from its walls. Closer inspection reveals that if one touches the walls, they will notice a sensation, not unlike receiving a hand massage from an Olympic shot-putter. This can can cause a sense of unease, and the hum itself can cause form of indigestion or nausea. Over here, we'll find a wonderful array of hovanite crystals, growing right out of the side of that wall. In 1906, upon discovering the cavern, Marcel Bakerson was recorded as saying of the crystals, "These look like the teeth of the Lord and Savior," and from that point on, became known as Jesus Teeth. Though the members of the Bakerson expedition succumbed to unexplainable inflammations of the lower intestine, eventually dying, their discoveries still benefit us today, as hovanite is commonly used as a pet food sweetener, and aids in gerbil fertility. Many arthropods inhabit Pogi's Cavern, and enjoy the benefits of dwelling in a cave system, rich with fungus. Like the susupede, which possesses twelve hundred legs, and excretes a sticky fluid, called shamakan, known in geologic circles as 'night pudding', a substance that produces vivid hallucinations if ingested. Looks like our little multi-legged friend thinks that microphone is its mother. Isn't that funny? Further into the network of caves is one of the largest natural grottoes in recorded history. Known as the 'Starboard Grotto', due to its glimmering, birdlike erosion discoloration all over its limestone enclosures, this could be called the most peaceful setting known in the cavern, and one can't help but feel the worries of the world slip out from under you. A calm now rides through the grotto, and causes one to marvel at the wonders; birth from the chaos of creation, a positive sense of self, pervasive pure, our perceptions of what is real, and what is not yet real but fully possible, overwhelms us, invalidates our dreams, our hopes, and our questions for the universe.