Inspiral Carpets – This Is How It Feels lyrics

never mind all the tattle of affairs and cheating and scandal.
gossip peddling and fearmongeri is the root of the problem
anxiety and depression neglect and abuse stem from
Trauma is the gift that keeps on giving...
and this song speaks clearly of how its passed from one generation to the next
at their age of writing this seems amazingly insightful...of adulthood.... as hearing as a child i knew "this" that they were singing about, and they would only have been 10 or 15 years elder

a kid is made to, or gets left to: feel alone, feel insignificant and feel completely worthless

young children see their parents as infallible...
so if there's anything wrong for the parents they will naturally feel they must be wrong in some way or have some fault...

and kids are loving and they do want to try and make everything alright

but if... nothing they can do seems to be good enough or can make things right, to satisfy a parent's need or requirement of them; or they never seem to be nearly as good when they get compared to a preferred sibling...
they get a bit disheartened or a bit frustrated

continued snd repeated.... over time when growing up (up 25 at least) it becomes ingrained, and adult who is stuck these feelings at every turn


what kind of parent will this child become...

one like 'mum' perhaps?
feeling these things all the time, not ever really sure why, ultimately withdrawing in not talking not doing anything...but still feeling in the wrong

or one like dad perhaps?
still feeling like a child, that he's got something wrong, to be the cause some problem

either way their kids are gonna suffer for this
not everyone can stick it out long enough to get to have kids

In my view, most of the other interpretations are looking at things TOO deeply. It's simpler to take ignore the opening lyrics, and start from "Black car drives through..." Taken from there, another man who outwardly has everything going for him has committed suicide, possibly for unspecified reasons but more likely because of his unrequited or former love for "Mum". She is distraught, with feelings either of part guilt for his suicide or simply love / fond memories of the times and love they had/could have shared, perhaps before she ever married or as an affair without the husband's knowledge (not the other way round).

It's about domestic abuse to me.

Husband don't know what he's done - intoxicated or an ignorant arse who thinks it's acceptable.
Kids don't know what's wrong with mum - why is mum scared, or hurting but not explaining why, or maybe hiding it, but not perfectly.
They can't see - abusive partners aren't going to do it in front of witnesses, including children, and the victim will often hide the abuse.
They can't know - kids are too young to understand.
This is how it feels to be lonely - an abuser will often cut a victim off from family, friends, and sometimes the world around them. Even if a victim isn't cut off, not being able to tell about something that can be so horrific is an isolating experience.
This is how it feels to be small. This is how it feels when your word means nothing at all - in an abusive relationship, the abuser will often seek total control, be jealous or suspicious, and minimize the victim's opinions and comments.
Black car drives through the town, some guy from the top estate - cheating, abuse and suspicion are not exclusive to any class.
Left a note for a local girl, and yet he had it all on a plate - cheating, accusations and jealousy become a control mechanism in many abusive relationships.

It's only a hunch, but has mum had an affair with 'some guy from the top estate', he's committed suicide and left a note which didn't mention her name but she knew it was about her. Not sure where the 'yet he had it all on a plate' fits in.

Ok so the original lyric was "seems they found him under a train" this was replaced by "left a note for a local girl" for the radio edit! This is the sad story of depression and suicide, the father/husband is suffering, but as with all depression sufferers he covers it really well and nobody knows about it. The lyric "Husband/Daddy don't know what he's done" means he doesn't know what sort of turmoil and upset he has left behind. The kids don't know yet, but they can see their mum suffering, she doesn't know how to tell them they're father has committed suicide. The black car driving through the town refers to the hearse taking him to his funeral.