As children we idealise our parents. It's very distressing to grow up and learn that the most happy childhood memories are often fraught with pain, hurt and shame. Parents need to start thinking about their children as more than just empty vessels. Children are incredibly receptive to actions and behaviours enacted by parents and naturally take up protective roles towards the abused parent. Let adult problems stay there and let it not plague the hearts and minds of our young special ones. I realised how parentified I'd become as a child, dealing with my parents' problems and taking care of my siblings. Up to this day the pain stays with me as I've lost out on a normal childhood and neglected myself. I've trying to cope with it and have an amazing partner who's helped me thus far. I maintain good relations with my parents but still cry each time after I meet them or talk to them because I still love them but it has killed off a part of me inside that cannot be repaired.