Joan Armatrading is the soundtrack to my life. I first heard her 40 plus years ago, listening to WBLM in Maine. How many of us have been in this same situation, male or female, after a one night stand wondering where you were and who you were with? "With one more human to despise" how poignant and direct is that? You feel rejected because a stranger, in your bed is jerk. Self esteem is the reflection of love we see in others, that is given back to us, not because they have to but because they need to.