For 8 years, I've been in love with this guy. I may sound pathetic, maybe delusional will be the right word. Is it even possible to love a guy who never knew that you exist? In my case, I did and that's the saddest part. He never know because I'm not brave enough to confess and it took a lot of courage when I tried to talk to him he just accused me of being a stalker, I was hurt but then I know I scared his ass off .Rejection is not something one could overcome easily From the very start I know I can't be selfish because he will never be mine. Who will love a girl like me who has dark past? Pieces by pieces I tried to pick up the pieces of my shattered life to be worthy of him, to feel my self worth, to learn to forgive and forget, to expand my horizon thinking that I'll be enough for him but who am I kidding, I'm still watching him from afar and making sure that he's okay and I'm happy for him and his girlfriend for 2 years now. I envy the girl who makes him happy, who know him better that I do, I wish I could be that one. Since he's happy now, I realized it's high time for me to move on and forget about him. I will always be thankful to him because in the darkest time of my life he's been my light and inspiration of course without his knowledge... hahhahahha! Someday I hope I will find someone who will love me unconditionally even when I totally mess things up. Will bring out the best in me. Whom I can tell my fears, doubt and insecurity Who will never condemn me nor judge me instead will support me and tell when to stop and I'm being mean.