Groucho Marx – Go West, Young Man lyrics

Mr Horace Greeley was no fool
I'm sure that you agree with me that Greeley was no fool
What he is getting at is that Mr Greeley was no fool
Boy The wisdom of the man can be denied by none
For he's the one that said

Before you go to Buffalo to Baltimore or Borneo
To Eastern Pennsylvania or Japan
Go West! Young Man

If you go to that land, sonny
You will have a lot of money
If you bring the money with you when you come
To the lone prairie, yippi-yi, yippi-yi
Yippi-yi-yi-yi!
Yippi-yi, yippi-yi, yippi-yi

Before you read a travel ad
And scamper off to Trinidad
Too often in New York and Yucatan
Go West! Young Man
In the East they live on doughnuts
In the West the natives grow up
And I guarantee you go nuts if you come
To the lone prairie, yippi-yay, yippi-yay
Yippi-yay-yay-yay!
Yippi-yi, yippi-yi, yippi-yi

A cowboy's gal is a real true pal
She will stick to him right or wrong
Right or wrong
She don't say nothing
And she don't do nothing
And she don't know nothing
And she don't want nothing but a horse
And a cowboy, for she's just keeps rolling along

Go West! Young Man
Go where the airport's tearing the chest, young man
You can ride a bucking bronco or a pony
You can cut a calf in half and make baloney
Go West! Young Man
Go right up there and give 'em the very best you can
Don't go east, don't go south, don't go north, have a care
Don't go up, don't go down, don't go here, don't go there
If it's true what they say about Dixie
Go West! Young Man

Go out and till the soil there
Dig for gold and you'll find oil there
Where the crow flies, where the snow flies, go, there's no "no"!
If you are fond of hunting there's no place that can compare
You may not bag a lion or a tiger or a bear
But if you want a jack-ass there are plenty of them there
Go West! Young Man

The judges there are very fair, they always are of course!
A cowboy and his Mrs went to court for a divorce
The cowboy got the children and the Mrs got the horse
All Go West! Young Man
Yi-hi!