Monoxide Child – Fear lyrics

Visions of my children wiping tear from open eyes
As they Kneel beside my coffin family say their last goodbyes
But ita the faces of my babies got me trippin' thankin' god for breath
Expressions filled with pain has got me strappin' on the vest
And I know that I ain't living right I hang on borrowed time
And this life's gone leave them bastards cause they pops has got to grind
Little mouths have got to eat so I hug them hit the streets
Spittin' time with them and money got me feelin' incomplete
And I ain't scared of any motherfucker fight the flames of hell
But a child without his dad has got me hiding in my shell
Got me shikin' in my boots to see them face this world alone
Are the strong enough to cope stuck in half a fuckin' home
As I lay them down to sleep its all on me their soul to keep
And if I die before I wake I pray to
God he's up there waitin'
With an army full of angels strapped with gats cause
I'm defying
Since I first became o father only fear I have is dying

This situation has got me losing sleep
I can not eat
I'm feeling weak the fear has got me
On my knees
The fear has got me

This situation has got me losing sleep
I can not eat
I'm feeling weak the fear has got me
On my knees
The fear has got me

After all that I have ever done
And all that you will ever see for life
Death beyond the grave
How will they remember me
I only fear the lost of my voice
When its gone
The only noise is the pen
I'm a writer by choice
I can cut my tongue clean off
And smoke myself toothless
I still be on the mic
Spittin' shit they call ruthless
The truth is
I go deaf dumb and blind in one ear
And be the dopes deaf dumb blind guy you ever hear
I ain't scared of dyin
Death I've been there
The pine box for many years
My return ain't bull ain't no reincarnation
Get lost in translation

This situation has got me losing sleep
I can not eat
I'm feeling weak the fear has got me
On my knees
The fear has got me

This situation has got me losing sleep
I can not eat
I'm feeling weak the fear has got me
On my knees
The fear has got me

Eyes open but I don't remember much
I try to focus but the light is bright as fuck
I go to sit up but I'm strapped and stuck
Stuck panic can't say nothin'
Like my jaw is wired shut
How the fuck did get to where I am is still a mystery
My memories not assistin' me
As I lay here in misery
Literally hopin' some body would give me some kind of time
I'm I dead of alive
Is this a dream or a sign
Is there a chance I can find my mind and rewind
But paint me behind blinds and find somethin'
Its like a game but nobody told me we were playin'
And the fact that I don't know if I'm alive and sane
And inside my brain only one thing remains
The fear of no knowing paralyzes all most everthin'
An second can be my last breath
And my best guess is nothin' with on memories left
I'm sorry

This situation has got me losing sleep
I can not eat
I'm feeling weak the fear has got me
On my knees
The fear has got me

This situation has got me losing sleep
I can not eat
I'm feeling weak the fear has got me
On my knees
The fear has got me